How do they make breakfast cereals? These products seem to be unique in the world's basket of foodstuffs in that they bear no resemblance to any natural products. A chicken in a supermarket looks like a chicken; a tomato looks like a tomato; and so on. But a breakfast cereal? The main ingredients are, apparently, milled corn, sugar, malt flavouring and "high fructose corn syrup", ie more sugar. In the world of bodybuilders who have to care about nutrition, it has to be said, that cornflakes are not rated very highly - even to the point where it has been suggested, facetiously, that there is more nutrition in the cardboard box in which the cornflakes are supplied than in the cornflakes themselves. These comments may be not entirely fair. Cornflakes has almost entered the language as a generic term to describe all breakfast cereals; and cornflakes to most of us means Kellogs. Cornflakes have been around for more than one hundred years, since they were invented by the Kellog brothers "in their quest for healthy foods."
Kellogs as a company are known world-wide and what would be more natural for such a prominent American company than to promote the healthy image of cornflakes by printing pictures of an American Olympic champion all over their cornflake boxes [as well as the similar frosted flakes boxes]? Who could be more suitable than Michael Phelps, the slightly geeky looking swimmer who captured a fantastic 8 gold medals in the Beijing Olympics last summer? No doubt they agreed to pay Mr Phelps quite well for the use of his image - and good luck to him. All was fine and dandy until last week, when, a photograph appeared that seemed to show the swimmer smoking a bong. He subsequently admitted smoking marijuana and instantly Kellogs cancelled his contract with a company spokesman saying that Michael Phelps's behaviour was "not consistent with the image of Kellogs." Oh, come on. He was smoking a bit of grass, something that millions of others around the world were doing on that very same day in November 2008. This is a recreational drug, not a performance enhancing drug and a 23 year old, quite rich American was reported for smoking it at a party. Shock! Horror! To suggest that this damages the image of Kellogs is pure ........ hog-wash. But this nonsense does not end with the cancellation of the Kellogs contract and Phelps's humiliating apology. It is suggested that this minor misdemeanour will destroy the whole of his potentially $100,000,000.earning power because no public company will want to touch this tarnished man. Michael Phelps has my total sympathy and I hope that he can achieve everything that he deserves from his fantastic athletic endeavours. We are here witnessing corporate humbug and hypocrisy on the grand scale. Everybody wants to get in on the act of condemning the man for his horrendous transgression. Do they get cash back or just brownie points for their self-righteous outbursts? Are the people who tell us that Michael Phelps's career is in ruins such fine, pure, up-standing and free of all sin individuals that they can clamber onto their collective soap boxes, halos aglow and proclaim this rubbish? All this is an age when financial wizards around the world can bugger up the whole of the world economic structure, without, apparently, even giving up their bonuses.
If all this rubbish were not bad enough the anti-doping in sport quangos - anxious not to miss a chance for a bit more pontification - are suggesting that they will make an example of Phelps to send a message to all other world-class athletes who need to be shown who is boss. God! This world is run by madmen and sanctimonious prats.
Good luck Mr Phelps. May you get things sorted and don't dare light up an old-fashioned fag or the anti-smoking lobby will be after you as well. From now on, I will not be buying any cornflakes - but, then, I wasn't buying any before, either.
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