Football is a funny old game as many a pundit has told us over the years but this last week-end showed us at least two extreme meanings of funny. Most of the time football exists only in a private fantasy land where nothing makes sense. For years now it has seemed that an essential requirement for any club keen to climb the Premier League and make it on the international stage has been having an exceedingly rich owner with so much money he could not find enough ways of spending his wealth or one who was prepared to spend much of his lesser fortune to be part of the fantasy land. Then there is Newcastle United. Newcastle United is a basket case, that much is clear. In the last twelve years they have changed owners, gone through a succession of managers who have either resigned in desperation or have been sacked. They had Dalglish, then Gullit and then Sir Bobby Robson. He had nearly 5 years in charge before he had a bad start to a season [2004] and he was sacked. By then the club was being managed by executives and there was much friction between manager, players and owners. Robson complained about over-paid young players, selected by others, who were paid buckets of money before they ever proved their value. Then it was Graeme Souness but he was no good and went following bad results and players fighting on the pitch. Then Sam Allardyce was brought in. But he didn't suit either, even though he had got the best results since Keegan and Bobby Robson. So he was sacked and then we had Keegan Pt 3. But he had to work with a Director of Football, Dennis Wise, who stayed in London but was in charge of buying players. And there were other directors to hinder Kevin Keegan.. So he resigned and is now suing the club. So they brought in Kinnear. He is in hospital for heart surgery - or possibly brain surgery - was he mad to come here and stay? Now its The Messiah, Shearer, to the end of the season at £100,000 per game and the club is deep in the relegation zone. It is amazing that anyone can consider this madhouse as anything other than that. They like their football on Tyneside but I think that they need to go over en-mass to support any club other than Newcastle United.
Then there is Luton Town, The Hatters, the club supported by Eric Morecombe, who yesterday won the Johnson Paint Trophy for clubs of Championship Div I and Div II. Luton, residing 11 points adrift at the bottom of Div II, managed to overcome Scunthorpe who are in 6th place in Div I and looking for promotion. Many commentators are saying that this was probably the best game of football yet seen at the new Wembley Stadium and a great advert for all football. Luton are struggling in their division not because they are particularly bad at playing football. No, it is because they were penalised 30 points at the beginning of the season for going into administration and getting into some shady dealing with transfers. None of this has anything to do with the present owners and management, who, with staggering understanding of reality quite alien to professional football, have cut the wage bill from £5m to £1.5m; got rid of over-paid under-performing players and brought in a lot of young talent - players who are prepared to work for less money to make their careers. The club spirit is good and 35,000 supporters went from Luton to Wembley - not far, I grant you - in order to support the club and boost the coffers. So now they have more money and the Paint Pot trophy. The manager says that they need to win six of the last seven league games if they are to avoid demotion from the football league. A tall order but I wish them the best of luck. They sound like a club that deserves some luck
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